15th December, 2024
Mkænby, Mkæniszna
The leader of the Akuan Socialists, both the political and paramilitary elements, looked around her new office. Well her official office, which was of course furnished to her request which met it, was filled with various symbols of her near-dead ideology. As well elements of Mkænian cultural heritage, what survived the red imperialists purges of them and those damn liberals to the west. Her office furniture itself, like the desk and chair being a dark spruce. With a plain wood paneling floor, rather than carpet by her strange request. Something to-do with her house slippers and static electricity.
Not that she was wearing her house slippers, no she wore her black combat boots and the rest of black military attire. She pulled out her chair, taking a seat in her shiny new office. Taking a quick look around before she lazily took out a fancy Jotun phone. Muttering to herself, “Who the fuck has their password as 1234.” As she typed into the password, scrolling down the contact list until she saw the name she wanted big brother. “Here it is, time to give him a nice ol’ call.” She kicked up her boots on the desk, calling the number.
“Andrine? Gods, where are you?? We’ve been trying to get hold of you for days, the police are looking for you!” The voice of the East Atlalandian president, Erik Tårnet, spoke out with a deep, heavy concern layered on it. With a large amount of exhaustion in it as well. It was clear the man must have been spending a large amount of his free time trying to get in contact with his own little sister.
“Shit is that how you’re supposed to pronounce that name? I just been saying Annie, like you know Annie, are you okay? Annie?” Ny’Mkæn gave a joyful reply. “How you been Mr. President? Still in power or have you been needing to look for a new job? Must be pretty rough few days recently.”
“I- Who is this? Why do you have my sister’s phone?” The president’s voice was immediately switched from worry to more accusatory in its tone. His voice became deeper as a result, as if that would intimidate her. “If you have as much as touched a strand on my little sister’s hair I will ensure you are hanging from a tree.”
“Oh no I’m positively shaking in my boots.” Ny’Mkæn gave a mocking tone in reply, not even remotely phased by the voice on the other end. Speaking in perfect Norgsveltian but with no trace of her accent. “It’s the ten million krone woman, the terrorist from the mountains and the only one who has your sister so keep your tone respectful dipshit or I’m going to mail your sister’s bald head in a box to you.” After waiting for an awkward moment. “Ny’Mkæn!” She sounded downright joyful, giving a song-like attitude while saying her own name. “Ah, can’t you just feel the Yule spirit in the air?”
The terrorist could almost hear the President gritting his teeth through the phone being quiet for a good while before he finally spoke up again. “What do you want? You here to taunt me, or to give me an offer? How much money do you want to give back my damn sister.” He growled out.
“Oh come on, you really don’t think so low of me I’m going to ask for a ransom? I thought we had a good relationship, I couldn’t have done any of these without you, my good president. Of course, of course I shouldn’t have to tell you any of this. I mean you interrupting that old fuck of a brewmaster at the funeral? Spirits! I was so worried there for a moment that you wouldn’t say anything but thank the spirits you did.” The colonel gave a laugh. “So honestly from the bottom of my heart, thank you none of this could ever have happened without you and your idiocy. Oh probably shouldn’t have to tell you of all people this but if ya do anything to I don’t know try to bomb me, trace the phone call or go to the public about this. Just consider your little sister dead, so let’s be friends.”
“If you genuinely have my sister, then I want confirmation that she is alive. I want to speak with her. Now.” The president was clearly still in an angry mood, unsurprisingly of course. “From all I know you already killed her, I cannot trust a word from a terrorist inferior filth like you. So let me speak with her.”
“Yeah no, you think I just bring around a crying knife-ear with me? Do you know how annoying that would be? I don’t even like your kind of people when they’re not whining about everything. Though of course, you can just do whatever you were planning to-do and then you never find her body. If you do somehow find her body, you are going to have to find all the missing pieces like it’s one of the video games. You play video games right? What’s the series with all the zombies and driving around one. Like you’re missing your wife or something and you have to drive around to find her zombie body parts? It’s going to be like that but without the zombies.”
“Neither she or me are el- Forget it, get to the fucking point you psychopath.” He muttered out angrily as the sound of something being moved around in the background.
“Oh there is no difference between a knife-ear and you kind of people anyway.” The colonel rolled her eyes. “I am going to be calling you a lot from now on, and if you miss a call or try to do something towards me. Then she is, of course, dead. Speaking of which, when do you usually go to sleep? Sleep is very important, you know, if you don’t have enough rest then your body starts having all sorts of problems.”
“You’re still not getting to the point. You have not given me any reason to believe you have my sister, why should I even entertain the idea of not having your location right now bombed?” Though he was clear with his threat both knew it was only that.
“You literally can’t reach me with your bombs dumbass, the knife-ears on our side have better defense then you got missiles. Listen your sister been missing for days, suddenly this beautiful, intelligent and heart of go-”
“You’re not.” The president was quick to interrupt in a stoic tone.
“Wow, you really know how to charm a woman. Is that why you’re still single and unmarried?” She gave a reply back in a surprisingly actually hurt tone. “You know for that, I will send you proof of life. Which finger and on which hand.”
“Ah yes I’m certain the terrorist mad woman has men flocking to her. Clearly you have found some Prince charming or whatever.” The president’s voice was turning more annoyed and mocking no longer taking her call as serious as he was earlier.
“Well clearly you don’t get on the internet enough and see all my fancams and edits.” She mocked him back. “You know all this talk of love, I think I will send her ring finger to you. Of course, unless you apologize and call me pretty. Then she can keep all her fingers.”
“Fuck off. You’ve wasted enough of my time. Hope you like the missile heading your way.” He growled out before the call ended. Bit annoyance to the terrorist in question.
“You know that Yule song? On the first day of Yule, my true love gifted me. One finger from my sister. No, no that’s not right. Honestly, wish you inbred knife ears did have twelve fingers, it would be a lot more comedic that way.” The colonel gave a sigh, “Alright alright I have to work on finding the right Yule song for us, but keep healthy now. Don’t want you being killed off or purged before I can sing the full version for you now.”
President ended the call there, not even making any witty comment back or angry yell. The phone call just ended in silence much to Ny’Mkæn’s disappointment.
The colonel turned off the phone, placing it onto the charger. “I am fucking pretty damn it.” She gave a sour tone to the audience of no one other than herself. Taking out a flip phone, one she just bought from the recently reopened Square Union. Dialing in a series of numbers before putting it up to her ear, then releasing that the phone was not for Kemonomimi and couldn’t reach her mouth if it was up to her ear. “Damn it Ny’Jerra.” Having to spend another awkward yet moderately upset moment to get a headset adapter to the phone before calling the number.
Before the other end of the line had a chance to speak. “You think I am pretty right?”
“I- Who is this?” Askil, the Kaldrbuthian Prince and third in line to the Kaldrbuthian throne, spoke up through the phone a bit confused in all honesty. Though for a moment there was some silence. “Wait I’ve heard that voice before, you’re the te- MSLF leader from the ceremony, right?” His voice took a more respectful, if not a bit of a scared adorable tone.
“Yes, yes Ny’Mkæn, I gave you that lovely gift.” The absolutely positively, and this is the writer speaking, batshit woman played with her hair. “That republican leader fellow, all nasty and messed up?”
“Yes… Though technically that was more a gift towards my mother, it was… nice to know he was captured…” The Prince said in a very nervous tone, voice still as adorable as always at least for the terrorist in question. Which if you asked her, was the only opinion that mattered in this case. “He was executed not long after, but still… I guess I should thank you for doing a good job. One can’t say you’re not… effective.”
“Aww, your mom took it?” She gave a small pout, keeping with her soft tone as not to scare the prince. “I hope you weren’t scared around him, I would hate to worry you.” Ny’Mkæn tilted her head as she spoke to him. “It’s nice that he is dead at least, though I hoped your mother did it in your name.”
The Prince let out a small chuckle and nervous one but clear he was acting calmer at least. “So… how did you get my number? It’s not exactly public, so it’s a bit surprising.” He asked in a polite, still awkward tone. “Not that I’m complaining, of course not.” Another awkward chuckle left him.
“Oh I have my ways to find people I want to talk to.” Ny’Mkæn gave a warm smile. “So can you answer my earlier question? Pretty please with sugar on top?” Her tone was playful with a prince, similar to a cat toying with a mouse.
“Oh, um, could you repeat the question then? I am sorry just was a bit distracted by the fact you did call me. Out of the blue and all that.”
“You think I am pretty right?”
There was a bit of silence as if the Prince was seemingly expecting more to the perfectly normal question. “Well, yes? I can’t deny you are very pretty… Doubt you need me to confirm that fact.” His tone was very confused.
“Oh Askil, I’m not a Hjørdist, I’m an Akuanist woman. We need to be called pretty by attractive men every now and then.” Ny’Mkæn gave a small giggle.
“Well, umm, thank you for the compliment? I’m a bit surprised you think so knowing that well.” His voice trailed off clearly not wanting to bring up the topic before he cleared his throat. Speaking in a more polite and ‘royal’ tone. “Eitherway, I assure you that you are a very attractive woman, and certain you will find the right one.”
“Oh I think I have.” She gave another giggle, before checking the time. “Oh spirits, I have to be in a meeting soon. I will call you later but not from this phone of course. I am wanted by several agencies after all.” Ny’Mkæn gave another giggle as she ended the call. Followed by unplugging the attachment to the flip phone, then snapping the said phone in half. Tossing it into a glass of water on her desk.
_
Hrafnheimr, Kaldrbuth
“Please gods, do not call me back…” The Kaldrbuthian Prince muttered out as he put down his phone, his silver nekomimi ears twitching as he stood up from his bed. The young kelf Prince wearing pair jeans and buttoned gray shirt immediately rushed out from his bedroom and down the hall, seeing his mother talking with a guard. “Mother! Please, I need a moment of your time.”
The tall elven woman let out a small sigh as she gestured towards the guard to walk away. Her cold blue eyes looking down at her son raising an eyebrow at him. “I do hope it is of importance, son.” Her tone was perhaps a bit colder than she meant it to be, but she was dressed in her religious robes and was about to head towards the temple service to give a speech. So she was rather busy.
“I-Its that, you know, that mad Akuan Socialist woman again? Ny’Mkæn? She found my phone number.” He immediately straightened his back, placing his hands behind his back as well to be respectful.
“Ny’Mkæn? You’re already calling her by her first name?” The Queen gave a curious look at that.
“Well, that isn’t important!” He gave a bit annoyed look at that but the stern look he got back made him clear his throat. “Sorry, mother. But still. Isn’t this a major breach of security? Like… she’s an Akuan Socialist, which I know its not my place to comment on politics but they seem insane.”
“Oh they are insane, you are perfectly accurate in that description. If anything it is a rather polite term for them.” His mother said in a matter of fact tone, as she took a moment to let out a sigh before placing a hand on his shoulder. “Did she do anything? If she threatens you I will get her killed immediately.” She gave a look towards him that he knew was confirmation that she was taking it seriously.
“No she didn’t do that. It was…” The Prince scratched the back of his head a bit awkwardly now, not certain how to bring this up.
“Was she calling to get some sensitive information?” She asked, still taking it seriously, rubbing her son’s shoulder trying to comfort him.
“…She wanted me to call her pretty.” He muttered out, not feeling as confident. Being a bit confused himself.
“…What?” The Queen’s previous attitude from pure seriousness went to become mild confusement.
“I know how that sounds, but it’s the truth. She called me to tell her that she was pretty, and that she found me attractive?” The Prince looked up at his mother with seriousness in his tone. Despite how ridiculous it was. His hands now behind his back again.
“So… she has a crush on you.” His mother straightened her back crossing her arms as she gave a more annoyed look towards him. “You’re really saying that a wanted terrorist went through all the effort to get hold of your number just to flirt with you?”
“I… Um. Yes?” He scratched one of his arms giving a confused nervous look.
“Askil. I do not have energy for you to complain about your fangirls. If you need someone to scare them off, ask your sister. I have much more important matters to deal with.” The Queen shook her head as she rubbed the bridge of her nose before turning around, not wanting to take any more time to deal with her son’s delusions.
“Mother! No it’s her! I know it is! She even mentioned the KRF leader!” He spoke up walking after his mother for a small moment.
“Unless the woman in question is threatening you, I do not want to hear it. Go to your sister to deal with women simply flirting with you.” She spoke in an dismissive tone before walking further away leaving her son to stand hall confused.
“But… it’s literally a terrorist…” He muttered to himself annoyed before shaking his head as he turned around to walk back towards his bedroom. “I hope she doesn’t call me back again. Maybe she just was in a pranking mood? Yeah that much be it, she isn’t actually into me. I’m a kelf she can’t be.” He kept muttering to himself in a way to cope with the situation.