The Dinarastan Freedom Fighter is a special news service for those in Dinarasatan (and Dinarastani refugees living in other nations) who want to get the cold hard truth about the country… not the hogwash that’s currently being published in the state-approved papers. Because of this, the Freedom Fighter is only available online. News will be published on a consistent basis.
THURSDAY, MARCH 2, 2006
Dictator bans more “crappy” music
Dinarastan’s brutal dictator, Boris Fattekhedinov, has banned more of what he deems as “crappy music” today, further limiting citizens in their personal choices. Last week, he banned all rap music and “crunk” music, claiming it was inciting violence and producing “annoying slang talk” in the young people of the nation. Now he’s added a singer named Rihanna to the list. A statement from Kuurmaa (the capital city) in the official state paper, The Dinarastan Express, read:
“Rihanna’s horrible music has caused numerous young people to go insane. Our insane asylums are full because of her, so we’ve decided to outlaw her music. Anybody caught playing any of that garbage music will be sent away to the Voloshzien Camps for an undetermined amount of time.”
Indeed, for those who aren’t in the know, the Voloshzien Camps are our dictator’s way of punishing those who dare to dissent. They are slave camps in which prisoners are worked to the bone daily, and frequently abused by their supervisors. Many come back with substantial weight loss, hearing loss, and are generally withdrawn from those around them. Although in the case of Rihanna, we agree her music is garbage, but we don’t agree that it should be banned.
Another opposition party member goes missing
Indeed, it seems Dictator Fattakhedinov is up to his old tricks; getting his secret police to round up those who don’t agree with his inane and outdated policies. It shouldn’t come as a surprise to no one that Mr. Fattakhedinov himself used to be a member of the KGB when Dinarastan was part of the Soviet Union. The missing person involved this time is Yuri Bangalov, the husband of Dinarastan’s Democracy Party member Ekaterina Bangalova. He was reported missing this morning after failing to return home from work after 48 hours. “Mr. Fattakhedinov thinks he can weaken us, but we’ll only just give it back to him twice as hard” threatened opposition leader Marina Slutskaya. “He’d better watch his back. We’re also hoping to get other, more powerful nations to come and help us”.
Yuri Bangalov is the third husband of the all-female Democracy Party members to go missing in the past month.