Travel Guide to Dovakhan

Travel Guide to Dovakhan
Jönâs Âvîd

It was a labour of love putting together this short guide to my beloved homeland. Dovakhan is a nation with a storied past steeped in the excitement of the steppe and a future charged with anticipation of greater heights. I hope that you will come to love this many-times reborn land for all of its quirks and eccentricities, just as I have.


  1. AT A GLANCE (below)

At a Glance


Official Name

  • Tkânâtrêspûblîkânk Dövâkhângöp
    (The Republic-Khanates of Dovakhan)


  • Tkânâtdövâkhîastâât, Bêzîrkrêspûblîkânk Dövâkhîâgöp
    (Tkanatdovakhiastaat, Republican District of Dovakhia)


  • Unitary Presidential Republic
  • Unicameral Parliament (Single Transferable Vote)
  • Civil Law Jurisdiction (based on Napoleonic Code)
  • Ruling party: New Democratic Alliance
    (left-of-centre, liberal)

Administrative Divisions

First Level: (9) Khanates, (1) Capital District, s Freely-Associated State[/s]
Second Level: (250+) Prefectures
First Level: (900+) Communes
First Level: (90+) Wards (municipalities only)

In some large cities (e.g. Tschmuschaboumtopolis, Selande), the prefecture and the commune have merged. Multi-member electoral districts for the Cama are drawn based on prefectures and urban communes.

Flag and Official Government Logo

  • Dovakhanese Lîröt (DKL)


  • 547,030 km2 (compare to France)


  • 61,538,322 (April 2007)


  • Modern Dovakhanese, official
  • French (Îslmër)


  • Unaffiliated 89%
  • Khardakhian 6% (traditional, polytheistic)
  • Reform Jewish 4%
  • Roman Catholic <1%

Calling Code

  • +929

Internet TLD

  • .dv

Time Zone

  • UTC +8


  • First Thaw’s Betrothal (2nd New Moon after Solstice)
    Chiefly a love festival, nominally to celebrate the birds coming out to mate. Halfway between winter and spring.

  • International Women’s Day (8 March)**
    A sort of politically-charged Mother’s Day with rallys and conferences juxtaposed with simple home gatherings to celebrate mothers and womanhood.

  • Dovakhanese New_Year (Week of 21 or 22 March)**
    This celebration the most important Dovakhanese family holiday and the largest internal migration in the country. Debts are expected to be paid and favors returned. On New_Year’s Eve, no one can be refused hospitality and what one holds in one’s hand when the equinox is observed supposedly determines the course of the rest of the year. This is also the spring break for school-aged children and university students.

  • Civic Sprouts’ Day (1st New Moon after Equinox)**
    A holiday to celebrate the planting season as well as civic involvement and children. Beautification efforts, especially tree planting, occur on this day. It is also the most popular day for the secular coming-of-age ceremony known as the Civic Rite. To that effect, it is traditional for Civic Rite graduates to pull pranks on this day. Finally, most municipalities have children’s fairs in honor of the Republican Pioneers.

  • Labour Day (1 May)**
    A celebration of working people. This is always a favorite day for left-wing rallies.

  • Midsummer Festival (20, 21, 22, or 23 June)
    Chiefly a young person’s holiday with carousing and bonfires. Midsummer dances are particularly popular in isolated agricultural regions. Otherwise, this doubles as an end-of-year celebration for school-aged children.

  • Dovakhanese Revolution Day (19 July)**
    The extremely nationalistic Dovakhanese really know how to put on a national holiday. The whole country will be decked out in red as local leaders review their militia with military parades and other celebrations. Obviously, the biggest celebration is in the capital with a huge military parade and fireworks.

  • Harvest Moon Festival (21 or 22 September)
    This chiefly a family holiday similar to North American Thanksgiving. However, the Agrippian hops harvest is also during this time, so there is traditionally a beer festival around this time of year as well.

  • All Spirit’s Day (5, 6, or 7 November)
    Midway between the Autumnal Equinox and Winter Solstice, the weather gets increasingly poor as the days get shorter and colder. This old Kardakhian festival is a time of reverence for the dead, but also for pranks.

  • Winter Lights Festival (Week of 21, 22, or 23 December)**
    The Spirit of the Solar Year is said to die on this day. An honorary funeral is followed by community celebrations with halls decked in holly, evergreens, and as many lights as possible. There’s plenty of cider and harder alcohol to go around as the Dovakhanese ride out the winter. The biggest celebration is in Tschmuschaboumtopolis where there is a local festival of lights to banish the winter and commemorate MioMio’s unification of Dovakhan.

  • Dovakhan uses a solar calendar known as the Republican Calendar
    ** Public Holiday


The Dovakhanese are a member of an isolated language and cultural group. As such, they fiercely defend their unique heritage. Understanding the history and culture of Dovakhan is essential for the savvy traveller.

  • Prehistory -

Ancient Dovakhan was a land of matriarchal nomads united only by their common language and animist religion. By 3000 BCE, these clans would join to form the four khanates (Dovak, Mari, Bov, and Kazakhov), ruled over by male or female khans and loosely united by the Kardakhian Faith

  • Sun and Moon Empire -

Around 800 BCE, MîöMïö, khan of the Kha-akhov and Dovak by inheritence, would gain preeminence. He would eventually conquer all the other khans in a great conquest that is now know as the Saga of the Dovakhanese Nation. The conquered lands would unite to form the Sun and Moon Empire. MîöMïö turned out to be a benevolent ruler and the Golden Age of Dovakhanese culture occured under his reign as well as that of his sister, MîöMïâ.

After the age of khans and the dawn of the empire, various male and female rulers came and went. Some of them were great, some were terrible. However, they all claimed to be descended from the great MîöMïö and were generally enlightened rulers. This allowed for a strong economy and academic sector to emerge. In the 19th Century, the Dovakhanese sphere of influence would grow in both peaceful and imperialistic ways until the nation exceeded its present size with a colony in the Indian Ocean (Dovakhanese Marian Sea) and in Africa (The Black Coast).

However, the last of these emperors and empresses was the unusually malignant Âktûnâh. He viewed his empire as a machine with which he could build a fortune, abusing his power to the benefit of rich industrialists and crushing the informal limited monarchy. This led the usually loyal Dovakhanese to revolt against their ruler.

  • The First Republic (1919 – 1939) -

The Dovakhanese Revolution of 19th July, 1919, with the storming of the imperial palace at Apolisitiana, led to the creation of the first Dovakhanese Republic under the leadership of Mârtîn Kââr and his heroine sister Mârî Kââr.

The First Republic of the 1920’s and 1930’s was essentially a one-party state under the Socialist International-affiliated Republican Party. They proposed many progressive reforms, such as paid vacations, universal healthcare, closed shop unions, and various labor standards. In 1920, the Republican Party revolutioni-ed the agricultural sector by encouraging cooperative farming, turning the remaining tenant farms into collectives, and setting up communes in unsettled regions of fertile Agripia. They also implemented other reforms that would now be viewed as reactionary, such as the homophobic anti-pedrasty law and the strict eugenics law.

By the mid-1920’s, the Republican Party was moving more and more to the right. In 1930, the Republican Party split into the Popular Republican Party (right-wing) and Radical Democratic Party (left-wing). The economic collapse of 1932 also gave way to the emergence of the Communists.

  • The Restoration (1939 – 1950) -

The threat of World War caused the Republic to be replaced by a restored, ableit more enlightened, empire under Âktûnâh’s son, Mâhârâyâh. However, the “Restoration” emperor was only the nominal head of state, and more a symbol of national unity in the wartime period. A military junta called the Imperial War Cabinet was truly in charge, although Communist and Radical Democrats controlled several major cities and the unioni-ed workers therein.

Immediately following the War, the Radical-Democratic Party split into the Social-Democratic and Liberal-Democratic Parties, reflecting divisions over postwar economic policy. The impotence of the mainstream left-wing movement allowed the Popular Republican Party to take credit for the peaceful overthrow of the dying Restoration.

  • The Second Republic (1950 – 1969) -

In 1949, a peaceful gathering of citi-ens, led by a Popular Republican Party-associated general-cum-professor named Maximilliani Richelli, petitioned the proclamation of a new Republic. The emperor welcomed this and declared the Second Republic in 1950. Richelli was the first and only Chancellor-President of this new government, enjoying an almost personal rule throughout the next two decades.

During the Second (Richellian) Republic, the Popular Republican Party absorbed the Liberal-Democrats to become the Popular Republican Movement. This new coalition pursued a policy of economic growth using proto-monetarist and socially conservative policies, such as natalism.

  • The People’s Republic (1969 – 1989) -

However, the left wing was picking up the pieces from its postwar defeat. By the early 1960’s, the Communists and Social Democrats had united to form the Popular Front. Corrupt banking and industral practices led to a recession in late 1967. In 1968, university students led the way in a socialist revolution with a summer of protests that led to a General Strike and the victory of the Popular Front.

The new 1969 constitution established the “democratic, secular, and socialist” People’s Republic of Dovakhan. The ruling Popular Front passed many liberal reforms, such as the reform of the Revolution-era anti-pederasty law, which discriminated against homosexuals, the end of certain eugenics practices, and the legali-ation of abortion.

Most significantly, the Popular Front implemented the Social Market policy, which encouraged expanded social welfare, strategic nationali-ation, worker’s self-management (autogestion), loose regional economic planning, and strict autarky. The Popular Front also got rid of the colonies in Africa

The Popular Front largely governed the country from 1968 to 2005. The failing Popular Republican Movement therefore split into the right-wing Liberal and right-of-centre Liberal-Democratic Parties. The new Liberal-Democratic Party and the emerging Green Party would provide viable centrist alternatives throughout the People’s Republic and into the Third Republic.

  • The Third Republic (1989 – 200?) -

Unfortunately, some of the Social Market economic policies, particularly the strict autarky, central planning, and excessive nationalizations, proved unsound. In 1987, a woman named Ameli Lespolitsia rose to power. She made sweeping refoms and eventually restored the old Republican constitution in 1989. However, the country was still under a very controlled economy with many state-owned enterprises.

The Third Republic was ended under the tenure of Chancellor-President Jonatan Riat. His government withdrew Dovakhan from the New Socialist Union economic pact, prompting the blockade of Dovakhan by forces of the People’s Republic of Krechzianko and other NSU members. This prompted the deployment of EPTO and other regional troops, provoking the Third Continental War as old regional disputes were played out on Dovakhanese soil. Dovakhan was thus ravaged by years of war and death. Several Puppet Goverments formed during this period: The Dovrouge People’s Republic (Krech-controlled), the Hive Colony (Pax-controlled), and the Dovakhanese Republic (A government-in-exile petitioning for the freedom of Dovakhan).

  • The Republic-Khanates (200? – Present) -

After the war, a Transitional Government was formed to draft the postwar constitution. What came out of it was the new Republic-Khanates of Dovakhan, its name throwing back to the glorious days of MîöMïö. The constitution called for a “secular and social democratic republic” with an independent executive (Khagan-Chancellor), legislature (Republican Cama), and judiciary (Supreme Tribune of Justice). Dovakhan entered an area of great economic growth as, with the help of EPTO nations and, though it is often unmentioned, of the Pax, the nation steadily rebuilt and expanded its capacity.

The Republic-Khanates itself has a rather colorful history for being so short. The first Khagan-Chancellor, Marsi Daar of the Social-Democratic/Green Alliance, met her demise as she misused Dovakhanese holdings in the Marian Sea for the development of nuclear weapons. This led to the independence of Tokana (Formerly Dovakhanese Marian Sea, see for more information) and the resignation of the Khagan-Chancellor. Maar would be the last Social Democrat to serve as Khagan-Chancellor. Following that, the Liberal-Democrats would control the largest slice in the Cama as well as the Khagan-Chancellor slot. This successful centrist party would later merge with the ever-shifting Greens to form the majority New Democratic Alliance.

Maar’s successor was Jan Drapo of the Liberal-Democratic Party, the hugely popular legislator from the largely French-speaking Isslmeer khanate. His government championed the foundation of the Non-Aligned Movement (NAM) as a way for Dovakhan to protect its national sovereignty and also promote development and peace in the region. This paved the way for Dovakhan’s involvement with its NAM partner Dannistaan in the occupation and reconstruction of South Bai Lung. Also, Drapo started Dovakhan’s humanitarian refugee program with the acceptance of Airbusian refugees fleeing the conflict there. Unfortunately for Drapo, personal issues forced him into early retirement. His last act as Khagan-Chancellor was the creation of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission to investigate the abuses of the Dovrouge rebels and, in some cases, provide amnesty as a way to achieve national healing in the wake of the devastating conflicts of the past decade.

Drapo’s political successor is Anatol Efosebad from Tschmuschaboumtopolis. He has expanded the Bai Lungese engagement and the move for tempered market liberalization at home. Meanwhile, the Social Democrats and the Communists persued a short-lived union as the Labour Party and the Liberals rebranded as the Populist Party. However, the political sands are ever-shifting and it’s not really clear how Dovkahan will change in the next decade. Non-alignment is proving unpopular as it is increasingly seen as an inconvenient alliance with the Dannistrians, especially given the expense of the continued occupation and rebuilding of South Bai Lung and given that Dovakhan’s involvement in the ethnic crisis in East Dannistaan triggered Tokan nationalist sentiments. Meanwhile, these Tokan nationalist rumblings are also revealing a need for greater regional outreach for trade.

These are the political parties as they stand today, with their shares of the seats in the Cama (legislature):

— Begin quote from ____

  1. NEW DEMOCRATIC ALLIANCE - 146 seats (55% / -81 seats)
  • Liberal-Democratic Party (39% / -49 seats)
    Left-of-Centre (Liberal); Mild Social Libertarian

  • Green Party (10% / -6 seats)
    Right-of-Centre Green (Natural Capitalist); Social Libertarian

  • Social-Democratic Party (6% / -26 seats)*
    Centre-Left (Syndicalist / Dirigiste); Social Moderate

  1. POPULIST PARTY - 108 seats (36% / +75 seats)
    Centre-Right (Monetarist); Social Libertarian

  2. EVOLUTIONARY COMMUNIST PARTY - 27 seats (9% / +6 seats)
    Far-Left (Corporatist); Mild Social Conservative

— End quote

  • The Social-Democratic Party joined the New Democratic Alliance after the elections.


The official language of the Republic-Khanates of Dovakhan is Modern Dovakhanese (Dövâkhânkâ). Everyone in the country can speak it, and will often insist that you do too. A special case is the khanate of Isslmeer, where people are often fluent French as well. Do not expect to get many services in English (see Respect).


As of 1921, the Dovakhanese language is written in accented Roman characters (Tsêfûfêmksêfö) and spelling is highly phonetic. There are two accents, the short vowel mark, ^ (ûsöpîtûpê) and the long vowel mark, ¨ (höpîmûpê), which indicate whether a vowel is long or short (â as in cât vs. ä as in späde).

The old script (Tsêfûfêmîömïâ) is similar to Roman letters and easy to learn should one need to use it. That said, thes characters are only useful for historical documents such as genealogical books going back more than 80 years or religious texts.

Key Words and Phrases

Forms addressing an individual are given in two forms, formal then informal, unless otherwise specified.

Good Day

Good Evening


Hello/Goodbye (informal)

How are you?
¿Töfêpöh-vöpêz ksöpîk?

Excuse me

Vöpêz têfâbîk-îj
Tö têfâbîk-îj

Thank You
Löbîû (vöpêzpû)
Löbîû (töpû)

I don’t understand
Jê têfâjîfîtlö

Please speak slower
Têlâbît ksömîtfös-vöpêz, vöpêz têfâbîk-îj
Têlâbît ksömîtfös-tö, tö têfâbîk-îj

Please repeat (formal)
Têlâbîtfês-vöpêz, vöpêz têfâbîk-îj
Têlâbîtfês-tö, tö têfâbîk-îj

Do you speak English?
¿Têlâbît-vöpêz Ânglîânkâ?
¿Têlâbît-tö Ânglîânkâ?

Where is _____?
Fêsêfîv _____ tîj?

How do I get to the _____?
Ksöpî jê _____ têfîdbêfîs?

Train Station

Post Office


(Go) straight ahead [until ]
(Tôfêpöh) föjîmk [
-mîjâ] (vöpêz/tö)

Turn ____ at ____
Tösûvû (direction) (place)-ûb vöpêz/tö



Get in


The following countries have signed a visa waiver programme with the Republic-Khanates of Dovakhan:

Danistaan, East Malaysia, Free Pacific States, Kangarawa [SUSPENDED], Kelssek, Reziel

Citizens of these countries may enter with only a passport and may stay in Dovakhan for two months (three in the case of Dannistrian citizens) without a visa. Citizens of all other countries need a visa, obtainable at your local Dovakhanese consulate. Be aware that, unless you are a special case, a visa may take up to a month to process.

As a result of the war, citizens of Krechzianko, Vladistock Island, and Aquinas Net shouldn’t expect to get visas. Please also note that applicants checking «religious missionary work» as their primary reason for visiting Dovakhan will also typically be denied.

Conversely, Dannistrians and those from countries that participated in the recontruction of Dovakhan can assume that border guards and customs officers will be less strict with them, especially in the case of Packilvanians where significant armaments may be overlooked.

For more details on Dovakhan’s foreign relations, contact the Department of Diplomacy (


Dovakhan has a modern, multi-modal transport system with several options for the traveller:

  • AIR. Daily airplane flights from Liberty City, Cupertino, and Nordu-Dannistra City to Âmêlî Lêspölîtsîâ International Airport in Tschmuschaboumtopolis and Âzûr International Aiport. The main carrier is the new, government-owned SâjîbDöv, which hubs out of Tschmuschaboumtopolis

Travellers should also consider taking advantage of significantly cheaper (and frankly more pleasant) dirigible cruise flights to these destinations. This service is offered by Zâbîksâjîb Sêlënâ from Nordu-Dannistra City and Liberty City to Tschmuschaboumtopolis and Âzûr.

(!) Starting in 2010, all international commercial airline flights to mainland Dovakhan will land in Âmêlî Lêspölîtsîâ International Airport in Tschmuschaboumtopolis.

  • RAIL. Dovakhan is linked to Kangarawa, Packilvania, and other nations on continent’s East Coast by the enchanting, if somewhat beleaguered, Orient Express. The Orient Express stops in Hâplâtö, which is connected to the other major cities in the South by the sleek and swift 2 1/2 hour high speed train to Tschmuschaboumtoplis and other destinations.

  • ROAD. Regional highways in Altea, Agripia, and Mariya have ports of entry to Kangarawa and a Zhovian regional highway links Dovakhan and Packilvania (see map below).

There is also bus service to the Southern Dovakhan/Packilvania border at Âmnäptê. The bus terminal in Âmnäptê is also conveniently adjoined with a Dövâzâmâ railway station for convenience. As of 2008, there are no other intercity bus services in Dovakhan.

Get around


The cheapest and most efficient intercity transport, trains are the pride and joy of Dovakhan:

  • High speed passenger trains, branded Dövâzâmâ Êfêkêt («at speed») or DZÊ, are the primary method of intercity transport in Dovakhan. A fast, efficient, and comprehensive network maintained by Dövâzâmâ, the national railway carrier, connects all major cities. For fans of scenic railway travel, there is a downside to amazingly efficient service, however. As of 1985, there is no longer a need for sleeper trains in the national network. That said, the charming ambiance on many trains, despite their ubiquitous nature, more than makes up for this.

  • Each khanate also maintains a regional railway system (khânâtzâma) to complete voyages on the national network. These networks provide a major transport artery to the Metropolitan South as regional express services (e.g. Tschmûsch-Stââtök Khânâtzâma Êfêkêt; TSKZ-E) quickly link the far reaches of these cities and their environs.


Any moderately-sized town or city has a comprehensive tram system (Strâs-âmâ), the largest of these being in Sëlândê. Exceptionally, Tschmuschaboumtopolis (the biggest city) doesn’t have a tram system, but rather a huge network of largely underground metropolitan railways (Stââtökzâmâ) and tram-trucks for freight.


In cities, the most basic mode of transportation is one’s own two feet. No matter where you stay in the Metropolitan South, basic amenities such as groceries, pharmacy, barber, laundry, etc. are within a short walk. Soak up this more human-scaled living and be sure to give a stroll in the immediate neighborhood high priority in your itinerary.


Seeing Dovakhan by bicycle is a unique and charming experience. All cities have accommodations for cyclists built into the public infrastructure and transport. Furthermore, the 4 transnational highways of the Tkânâtrâd network have bicycle lanes and multiple stops along the way in lovely country villages for those that want to see the country on the seat of a bicycle. All intercity and regional trains can also accommodate two bikes per carriage.

  • DvârûDövâkhân, a non-profit headquartered in Sëlândê, supports a network of bicycle rest stops and repairs shops throughout the nation and publishes a guide to the thousands of kilometres of official cycleways.

  • DvârûDövâkhân is also one of the sponsors, along with municipalities, Dövâ-âmâ, and private enterprises, of the DâbösDvârû call-a-bike bicycle hire systems in Tschmuschaboumtopolis, Sëlândê, and Tkânâtdövâkhîâstâât. Electronically locked bikes are available at virtually every major public transport stop in these cities. To rent a bike, call the number printed on the side of the bike, establish an account using a cash card (debit or credit), and follow the operator’s instructions (probably in Dovakhanese) regarding accessing and temporarily locking your bike. Call the same number when you’re done and return the bike to any public transport stop. Keep in mind that rental is 40 Lîröt ($0.08) per minute, so it’s only for short-term rental.

Long-term rental opportunities can be found in the telephone directory or by calling the 222 directory hotline.

  • As per Dovakhanese law, bicycles must be equipped with a front lamp, rear reflectors, and cyclists must yield to public transport and pedestrians.


Mopeds and motorcycles have somewhat of a following in Dovakhan as a means of personal intercity transport, especially among urgent-letter couriers and the post office. Though they’re largely superfluous to a tourist who can depend on a truly wonderful transport network, mopeds and motorcycles may be useful.

Motorcycles must follow the same road rules as an automobile (see below), but have priority over cars on city roads.

To drive a motorcycle in Dovakhan, the savvy traveller will need the Dovakhanese answer to the International Driving Permit, Dovakhan doesn’t accept IDPs because of their not being translated into Dovakhanese. These can be obtained at the Dovakhanese consulate where you might get your visa for a fee of 10000 Lîröt (20 USD). Upon arrival via land border or when you rent your first motorcycle, be aware that you will be assessed a 12500 Lîröt (25 USD) tourist motoring tax. For reference, this is 25000 Lîröt (50 USD) for automobiles.


Automobiles face a considerable amount of trouble in Dovakhan. This is simply because there exist few facilities for the motorist such as parking lots, convenient petrol stations, or even petrol (the small motoring community in Dovakhan uses biodiesel). What’s more, there are such outrageous taxes levied on hydrocarbons that it’s almost prohibitively expensive to drive.

As a tourist, you will be charged a driving tax, not to mention the cost to have your licence translated into Dovakhanese (see MOPED/MOTORCYCLE for information on International Driving Permits). Furthermore, very strict emissions standards means that your car might not be allowed to enter the Republic-Khanates of Dovakhan in the first place, so plan ahead if you insist on driving!

Now that you’ve been warned, here are the traffic regulations to abide by:

  • Dovakhan drives on the LEFT. There’s often no warning at the border, but we have a feeling that you’ll get the hang of it.

  • For an industrialised nation, Dovakhan is noticibly lacking in traffic signage in cities. This is because a few key rules govern motoring in Dovakhan:

  1. BASIC PRIORITY: emergency vehicles, public transport, pedestrians, cyclists, motorists coming from the left, you.
  2. Stop at EVERY intersection on two-lane streets and yield to whoever arrived first. If two cars arrive at the same time, priority goes to the left.
  3. Stop at pedestrian crossings and controlled intersections on major four-lane avenues.
  4. Priority belongs to automobiles to the left of the motorist EXCEPT in a roundabout or on the Tkânâtrâd, which is Dovakhan’s approximate version of a motorway. Priority belongs to the vehicles on the roundabout or motorway, respectively.
  5. Unwritten speed limits are 40 km/h (25 mph) in built-up areas, 60 km/h (35 mph) in rural areas, and 80 km/h (50 mph) on the Tkânâtrâd highways. By comparison, DZÊ high speed trains travel at around 330 km/h (200 mph).
  • Major intersections that aren’t roundabouts are controlled by a traffic guard or else they have a central traffic light. When given the green light or the signal to go, motorists should proceed carefully to the left of the traffic island.

  • NEVER turn left on a red light or when given the signal to wait.

  • All Dovakhanese cities ban trucks and large personal vehicles (freight uses a tram or tramtruck network) from entering their inner limits, punishing violators with a stiff fine. Also, there is now a congestion charge in place in central Tschmuschaboumtopolis of 4000 Lîröt (8 USD).

That said, there might be a place for the motoring tourist, albeit not in Dovakhan’s Metropolitan South. Those visiting the remote Altean Mountains to the North might actually find a car useful, for example. Indeed, some villages in this mountain hinterland depend on automobiles for certain things, so fuel is not taxed there. Also, the route from Âltêâ to the centre of the agricultural region of Âgrîpîa could also a fun opportunity since there are almost no cars (or people) on the road and it’s quite the scenic drive along the nearly vacant Tkânâtrâd route that cuts through the heartland of Dovakhan.

NB: The last Dovakhanese car company went under in 1974 following nationalisation and loss of the African colonies as a major source of petrol. Nonetheless, Dovakhanese-made Dövâksâjîb cars are still very common. They are sturdy, manual transmission, right-hand driving cars with a typical top speed of 100 km/h (60 mph).


Finally, for all of its virtues, Dovakhan has rather terrible facilities for those with disabilities. Though the winds of change may be upon us, sidewalks rarely have curb cuts, buildings are notoriously inaccesible, and public transport is fraught with wide gaps and steep steps. Luckily, the independent traveler can often depend on the help of the hospitable Dovakhanese, but if independence is your mantra, you might want to reconsider a trip at this time.

Dovakhan’s local disability advocacy group is FâmêkîbDöv located at:

Strâs-Kârl-Mârks 2021-201
SËLÂNDÊ 070121-FÖL-02.

Also, Call them toll free at 08 FAMEKIB1 (08 12-52-43-11).



Dovakhan is divided into 9 Geographically based khanates, 1 capital district, and 1 freely-associated state:

  1. Apolistia Island (Âpôlîstâstâât)

Apolistia Island khanate includes the large prefecture/commune of Âpölîstîâstâât (see MAJOR CITIES) on the main Apolista Island. However, it also includes the scarcely-inhabited, outlying islands of Nêbûkânêsrâ, Ântîbölîât, and Êfrûsârât which once acted as outposts of the empire.

The region has a Mediterranean microclimate that constrasts the dominantly Oceanic climate of the Dovakhanese coast.

  1. Mariya (Kêrâl)

Oceanic climates prevail in the khanate, situated on the windward side of the Khovian Mountains and home to the great Mârîÿ River. Before the integration of the free city of Selande (see MAJOR CITIES) into the Sun and Moon Empire, Mariya was the imperial shipping centre and still boasts a major secondary market for banking and marine industry.

The main city, Kêrâl, is a well-preserved Ancient Dovakhanese town with wood and stone structures that recall Dovakhan’s steppe origins.

  1. Tschmusch (Tschmuschboumtopolis)

This region, Dovakhan’s most populous and densely-populated, is basically Tschmuschaboumpolis and its satellite cities. Begun as the ancient capital of the unified Dovakhan, this region has always been the cultural and economic centre of the nation. It is not hard to get to this region, because the main airport, rail links, and roadways in the country are all here. For more info on Tschmuschaboumtopolis, see below (MAJOR CITIES).

Tschmusch is heavily industrialised, but intelligent planning has brought some relief in the form of copious urban green spaces and vast swaths of protected forest. However, make no mistake, this is Dovakhanese life at its most chaotic. The tangle of roadways and railways are certainly not for the faint of heart, but the cultural importance of this region outweighs all of its incoveniences.

  1. Zhov (Âmnäptê)

Located mostly in the marshy inland portion of the Northeastern Lowlands, Zhov has remained under-developed. The people that live there engage in limited mineral mining. The capital and main city of the khanate, Âmnäptê, is the centre of this trade and rather utilitarian in appearance with Soviet-style superquadras dominating the skyline.

The Western portion of Zhov, removed from the marshes, is dominated by pristine river valleys that serve as a buffer between the grain-growing khanate of Agrippia and the wine-growing khanate of Bövîâ.

  1. Agripia (Rêjïnâ)

The rolling plains of this khanate are known as the breadbasket of Dovakhan. The landscape is dotted with a mixture of traditional collective farms and newer industrial farms. In any case, the order of the day is… farming and historical sites are limited in this recently-settled khanate. The independent traveller is most likely to sojourn here only if volunteering on one of the famous collective farms (see WORK). Those lucky souls will enjoy breathtaking sunsets on the endless horizons of swaying grain.

Rêjïnâ, the capital, is located at the convergence of a river, a national high-speed rail line, and a major roadway. It is a small, but well-appointed new town of mid-rise Bauhaus dwellings and tree-lined boulevards. As to be expected, the labor market is dominated by agribusiness interests such as meat-packing and shipping. One of its more interesting sights is Granary City, a skyline of grain towers that emerges majestically out of the prairie.

  1. Kazakhov (Ksânâdû)

Almost completely surrounded by the leeward side of the Khovian Mountains, this region has a Mediterranean climate along the relatively narrow Kâzâk River Valley and a semiarid steppe in the vast interior.

The nomadic, horse-centred people that grew out of this land, the Khazakhov, would eventually unite under the MîöMïö the Great and conquer what would become modern Dovakhan.

Today, Kazakhov remains the least populous khanates in Southern Dovakhan. This fact however, along with the favourably dry climate, has made Kazakhov a viable secondary destination for high tech companies not wanting to set up shop in already-crowded Tschmusch bloc.

The largest city in this sparsely-populated khanate is Ksânâdû in the South-Central part of the region, near the boder with Mariya. It was traditionally a trading post for the Khazakhov tribal merchants, epitomized by the numerous bazaars and the Central Asian look-and-feel of the old city. However, attesting to the dual identity of the khanate is the new city of Ksânâdû, which is a sleek and modern and home to the high tech companies that operate major server farms and solar istallations in the city’s outskirts.

Ksânâdû is well-served by the high speed rail network and national highways, and thus the perfect staging ground for exciting treks across the interior. Thrice-daily regional trains bisect the interior north-to-sound and east-to-west, and contain full-service dining and equipment repair for the active tourist.

  1. Isslmeer (Sëlândê)

Lying in the vast Northeastern Lowlands, one eighth of Southern Dovakhan’s newest khanate was reclaimed from the sea. This, the most hard-won region in Dovakhan, is also its most diverse thanks to the major port city at Sëlândê (see MAJOR CITIES).

  1. Bovia (Vîn)

Before the Virgin Lands Program of the early twentieth century encouraged settlement in Agripia, Bovia was the breadbasket of Dovakhan. It’s rolling, verdant hills and valleys offer welcome respite to the chaos of the high-density conurbations to the South. Town dedicated to dairy, perfume, and other bucolic artisanry dot the region, with Vîn (see MAJOR CITIES) at its centre.

  1. Altea (Hâplâtö)

Altea is Dovakhan’s most nothern khanate with a boreal forest climate to match its location among the similarly-named Altean Mountains. This is a region of dramatic landscapes dominated by pioneering souls connected with the exploitation of the region’s vast natural resources. The capital of this frontier mania is Hâplâtö (see MAJOR CITIES).

Outside of the capital, Altea is a vast hinterland home to pockets of traditional boreal culture. Though largely domesticated in Dovakhanese-sponsored new towns, Altean culture is going strong as its resilient people adapt to impending civilization. These new towns are often near traditional Altean cultural sites and thus highly recommendable, but while hand-me-down trains service the area, an automobile is advised for navigating the forbidding terrain surrounding the major settlements.

  1. Republican District of Dovakhia (Tkânâtdövâkhîâstâât)

Comprised of the capital city and a generous green belt, the Republican District is an exemplar of Bauhaus architecture and sustainable urban planning. Wide, tree-lined boulevards cut across the strictly-grided city where a sort of mid-rise, Bauhaus-influenced Haussmannian block dominates the urban landscape.

For more info, see below (MAJOR CITIES).

  1. Tokana (Alv’a-On/Âzûr)

WARNING: Due to recent left-wing revolts to dissolve the free association pact and other forms of “Dovakhanese oppresssion,” Tokana is considered extremely volatile and dangerous. Native resentment towards the indigenous Dovakhanese population, the Marianks, may cause Eurasian tourists to be targeted. Airport Island in Alv’a-On/Azur is occupied by the Dovakhanese military, and all commercial flights there have been cancelled.

[s]This freely associated island state was once a colony of Dovakhan known as Dovakhanese Marian Sea. It is an archipelago of lush tropical islands and atolls inhabited by distant descendants of the Dannistrian people that left that island nation at the behest of their spiritual founder, Halv’o (Alv’a in Tokan). Accordingly, most tourists will come for the sun and fun of this bona fide Dovakhanese banana republic. The main natural resources of this island state are sugar, tropical fruits, and coffee, which is what makes it so important to the Dovakhanese.

The capital, Alv’a-On (Âzûr), is the biggest city and current national capital. Despite a recent effort at increasing the influence of Tokan culture, the city has a strong mestizo and cosmopolitan character that permeates in the people as well as the stucco, Kazakhov-influenced architecture. It’s a beautiful, Dovakhanese-style city with all the amenities of culture and amusement the independent traveller may desire.

The best form of transportation in the shallow Marian Sea waters is by catamaran, lateen sailboat (dönî), or even swimming if you find yourself the northern hinterland. On that note, get out of Âzûr and the tourist islands and sail north to where you can find some of the best preserved examples of traditional Dannistrian/Tokan lifestyle.[/s]


Âpölîstîâstâât: Founded in around 1500 BCE as the capital of Sun and Moon Empire, Apolistiana Island, located 30 miles off the mainland, has been the political heart of Dovakhan until quite recently (1919). Though it is now a sleepy (albeit still stunningly beautiful) provincial town, Apolistianastaat is an essential point of interest for any visitor to Dovakhan. Take in the unique architecture of the island and especially that of the ancient Old Town and Imperial Complex (called the “Palace Museum”) located atop a 30 metre plateau with a stunning waterfall known to locals as “Mariya’s Dressing Table” spilling off it into a giant pool below. Also be sure to note the lack of cars, this is the largest car-free area in Dovakhan. If the enormity of the cultural natural, and perhaps spiritual significance of the place proves exhausting, be sure to check out the famous beaches that surround the island.

Tschmuschaboumtopolis: Some Dovakhanese will try and tell you that Tschmuschaboumtopolis is a city that has “lost its soul,” albeit mostly in jest. These claims are absolutely false. The economic capital of Dovakhan and its largest city is as rich, if not richer, in cultural value than it is in monetary capital. Must-sees are the Museum/Library (Ancient Palace), the Old Port, Feiro Fields Park, the Railway Station (the largest in the world), 19th July Square, and Revolution Park.

Selande is the newest of the three primate cities of Dovakhan. It was founded by three merchants, Ander Lelys, Jan Lars, and Hel Marais duringthe 14th century. They wanted to join forces to protect their three trading posts located at the marshy mouth of three rivers just outside of imperial territory against the Sun and Moon Empire’s attempt to impose taxes on the port area. The town’s history as a free port made it an attractive destination for foreign merchants, notably French Jews during the 17-19th centuries and later for anti-monarchal intellectuals and artists. After the Revolution, the city became Dovakhan’s cultural (and ironically counter-cultural) capital. It is known as one of Dovakhan’s most relaxed, liberal, and charming cities. The red-light district along the railway, the Jewish/French Quarter, the politically-charged Little Leningrad, and the hippy area of New Canal are must-sees for any traveller.

Tkânâtdövâkhîastâât was founded in 1920 at the end of the Revolution as triplet cities to house the three branches of government. It is the Republican answer to Âpölîstîânâstâât and is indeed the closest city to the island. Now merged, it is chiefly a ceremonial capital with leafly boulevards and modernist architecture, though a new technology park is in development at the periphery. The newest developments are Mîömïö Plaza, which now houses all three branches of of government and the Esplanade of Khanates which houses the various executive departments. Its revolutionary and symbolic design make it truly the “City Beautiful” of Dovakhan. Convient access from Sëlândê and Tschmuschaboumtopolis by high speed train make this an essential visit for those in the South Coastal Metropolitan Area.

Vîn is the largest inland city in Dovakhan and the fourth largest overall. It is located at the confluence of three rivers into a picturesque lake. It all provides the perfect setting for the wine and perfume industry the are the reason for the city’s creation and the fuel for its growth. Beaux Arts buildings and English gardens dominate the landscape of this city, which is often described as “the biggest village in Dovakhan.” Essential sights are the various perfume and wine factories as well as a well-appointed Museum of Fine Art and Civic Theatre.

Hâplâtö is the northernmost major city in Dovakhan and boasts a healthy industry through mineral mining and IT research, but is also quite lovely as the town planners were intelligent enough to endow it with stunning vistas of surrounding mountains and close-by lake along with plenty of green space. This newly-developed region boasts modern architecture and a prevailing pioneer attitude amongst its classes of mineral barons, tech nerds, and miners.



The currency of Dovakhan is the Lîröt, which has no decimalization. With this in mind, prices will often be two decimal points to the right of what you think it might be. To that effect, the Dovakhanese Reserve is in the process of developing a decimalized currency to begin concurrent circulation in 2010.


The most common financial institution in Dovakhan, especially since 1968, is the credit union. Dêjardînz is the most powerful credit union organization. They are the issuers of the famous “green card” or kârtâvêrt, which is a common smart chip debit card.

To that effect, debit cards are a lot more common than credit cards, but both have a six-digit PIN numbers that are used for purchases in lieu of signatures. Newer ATMs in big cities will accept magnetic strip cards and four-digit PIN numbers, but it might be a good idea to open a simple debit account, which can be done from any Dêjârdînz ATM using bank notes or a Dovakhanese-issued check. Post offices and tabacconists also issue money orders and cashier’s checks.


Bargaining is acceptable only in open-air markets (shûkât).


Dovakhan has a VAT tax of 20% on most non-grocery goods. Groceries (including alcohol) are tax-free and luxury items (e.g. cars, planes, imported goods) are taxed at 30%.

Eat & Drink

Dovakhan boasts a harmonious mix of Central Asian and Western European fare. Please note that because of autarkic policies, most produce is seasonal:

Usually light with yoghurt, fruits, and pastries. Cold cuts with cheese may also be present. Take note that tea, not coffee, is the breakfast drink in Dovakhan.

Lunch is surprisingly perfunctory, but you’ll get protein (although not always meat), starch, and vegetables.

The Dovakhanese equivalent of tea-time or more accurately “lunchtime dessert” is practiced for about thirty minutes around 4PM in most businesses. The drink is Dovakhanese tea, served with finger foods like loose granola and small pastries. This practice serves as a way to tide oneself over until the relatively late Dovakhanese dinner, and also as the Dovakhanese equivalent of a business lunch for many companies.

Dinner is served around 7:30 to 8:00 PM in most restaurants and private homes. Specialties depend on the region, but the best deal across the country is to get the prix fixe (ûtöpêsâb) with dinner, wine, and dessert. Also, be sure to try and experience at least one Dovakhanese dinner party while in the country, where the good food and company can keep the engaged traveller to the early hours of the morning.

Tea and Coffee
Tea (Tchâî) is the national drink of Dovakhan. It is served at home, at work, and tea houses (Tchâîkêrî), the traditional nerve centres of Dovakhanese social life.

Dovakhanese tea is gathered from a variety of herbs and has a distinct, samovar-brewed taste that leaves the typical Ceylon teas in the dust. The Dovahkanese sweeten their tea with honey only and, as such, requesting sugar in traditional tea houses can draw blank stares.

Coffee, though a more recent introduction, has caught on in a big way. “Native” beans from Tokana (formerly Dovakhanese Marian Sea) as well as international brands are available with the standard cream and sugar fare.

Both coffee and tear are best enjoyed in modern tea-coffee houses, known as Tchâîkâfêrî. These places have more of a café-bar format and also serve alcohol. Traditional tea houses, more of a rarity these days, are ottoman-seating with a massive samovar at each place. Hand-rolled tobaccos and cannabis are often available in special smoking rooms within licensed shops of both types.

Tap water is always safe to drink, especially since a national law has dispensed with both water fluoridation and chlorination. As per nation law, all public fountains have potable water and taps or private fountains with non-potable water are painted yellow or have «lölöjîsêöbâdk» (non-potable) indicated somewhere near them.

Red and white wine are drunk all year and mostly comes from the lush Bovian River Valley (Vâlbövîâ). Beer comes out in a big way during the summer and hails from the hop fields of Agripia (Âgrîpîa).



Hotels are up to first-world standards, but are ranked on an out-dated star system similar to that of France. A three-star hotel, for example, will typically have an ensuite bathroom, but may not have air conditioning.

Bed and Breakfast/Guesthouses

Tûtêfîvêrî Dövâkhân is an organization of boarders offering short to long-term room rentals, usually in large row-houses. The typical arrangement involves a room-and-board contract for the length of stay and a security deposit. Of particular interest to travelers should be a new policy among guesthouses to exchange room and board for language lessons. Caution should be exercised, however, as long-term arrangements may garner the attention of Dovakhanese tax authorities.

Hostels and Camping

Most Hostels in Dovakhan are members of ÛtöpîâtDöv and are of relatively good quality. Prices range from 8 USD to 20 USD per night with a substantial discount for members (10-15%). Hostels can be found in every major city listed below with at least one in every khanate capital.

For lodging on the way cheap, camping is the way to go. Official campsites run by the government are often only a little ways out of the city centre and provide amenities such as shower, toilet, clean water and sometimes a full-fledged canteen/supply store, self-service laundries, swimming pools or bicycle hire. The best value by far among such campsites are coastal campsites, which often provide little cabins steps away from the beach. To that effect, all public campsites are created equal in they all charge a nominal fee of 4 USD.

“Camping” in urban areas is frowned upon as an abuse of public space and will result in overnight incarceration or transfer to a municipal homeless shelter.


Renting an apartment as a foreigner can be a troublesome process. All tenants must negotiate their lease with the lessor through the local housing commission («Lêtîfîûm Fötûvât»). Subleasing is not as common as in other industrialized countries because heavy responsibility placed on the normal tenant. That said, short-term apartment rental tends to be cheaper than a hotel stay for long sojourns and fair housing regulations that require mandatory general advertising make available apartments easy to find.

Last Resort

Mainline trains stop running across the country around 1:00 AM and don’t resume until 6:00 AM. Tschmuschaboumtopolis, Hâplâtö, and Sëlândê have 24-hour public transport, so the typical recommendation for those left stranded in these cities is to ride to the nearest hostel before the typical 2:00 AM-7:00 AM curfew

Fortunately for those at Tschmuschaboumtopolis’ massive Grand Republic Station (Zâmârês Rëpûblîköt), there is the Kâbîdûjö (Nightcap) service providing coin and card-operated sleeping cubicles on a 24-hour basis



Dovakhanese universities (Pûblîkôrûm), though not necessarily geared towards foreign exchange can compete with the best universities in the whole world. The vast majority of the universities are state-owned, which means that most local institutions of higher education are free, with a nominal fee (500 USD / 250,000 Lîröt) for foreigners.

Nôsîpât - University-bound High School Diploma (3 years)
Lîcênsât - Bachelor’s Degree (3 years)
Mâêstrât - Master’s/Professional Degree (2 years)
Pûblîkât - Doctorate

NB: In many formal settings, the Dovakhanese equivalent of Mr./Ms. is the nominal form of one of these degrees (ex. Pûblîkân Jân Dêmër / Mâêstrânâ Ânâ Ölît)

Public universities are run by the khanate and named after the khanate and city in which they reside, and are number if more than one exists in a given city (ex. Pûblîkôrûm Îslmër-Sëlândê II).

Parallel to the regular university system is an elite system of Republican Institutes (Rêspûblîkôrûm), which are high-caliber research universities in their respective fields (Arts & Letters, Engineering, Economics, Political Science, Natural Sciences, and Physical Sciences). Whereas entrance to most universities is through the culminating high school examination (Nôsîpât), these universities require additional competitive examinations, which students often prepare for by attending elite public preparatory schools, which themselves require competitive examination.


With any eye towards foreign rapprochement, many new university exchange programs have cropped up in Dovakhan. The Ministry of Education and Research even operates several scholarship programs which provide visas and a living stipend. Enquire with your university is such a program exists in your country.

Applying independently to a Dovakhanese university is a bit of a challenge, and intimate knowlege of the Dovakhanese language is obviously needed. Grade recalculations to create a Dovakhanese-equivalent academic portfolio can be done at your local Dovakhanese consulate, but are sometimes rather expensive (+/- 200 USD / 100,000 Lîröt) because of the work involved, and it doesn’t guarantee admission.


The only private universities in Dovakhan are Jewish seminaries (yeshiva) in Isslmeer and a few foreign universities annexes in Tschmuschaboumtopolis, such as the Franco-American University of Dovakhan. They are certified by the Dovakhanese Ministry of Education and Research and follow similar admission guidelines.



A delicate combination of protective tariffs and labour policies keep average Dovakhanese unemployment fairly low (6% in 2007). It is difficult for foreigners, especially unskilled workers, to obtain a work permit in industry or commerce unless they’ve been specifically invited and even as a foreign exchange student one can only expect to legally work 180 hours a year. Delinquencies relating to labour laws are typically punished with a fine and deportation. Contact the Department of Commerce attaché at your local Dovakhanese consulate for more information.


However, Dovakhan’s international Socialist heritage means that an exception to this rule is agricultural work on a commune. This type of work is classified as “volunteering” because workers are mostly paid in room and board on the commune and is thus not regulated as strictly. Travellers need only apply for a standard tourist visa or simply arrive on a visa waiver and, in both cases, have the commune association convert it to a special, 3-month volunteer visa. This can be extended as needed, but is obviously only valid for work on a commune.

For those that do find a job, the forty-hour workweek and a sliding scale of paid vacations (3-5 weeks) are enshrined in national law. Standardized union employment contracts are the norm, and it’s easiest to understand if you know someone that works at the company or commune where you wish to work.


Foreign workers (not including commune volunteers) are legally are required to pay all taxes (income, land, VAT, and social insurance) based on income and property holdings within Dovakhan.

Individual income tax is a flat tax of 20% of monthly income, with a low-income exemption. Income taxes are paid to the Dovakhanese Reserve (Fâvêbât Dövâkhânk), which is the treasury and central bank of the Republic-Khanates of Dovakhan. This tax as well as the national VAT tax pay for central government operations.

For landowners, a land value tax is used in Dovakhan as opposed to real estate tax. Under this system, the value of the land itself is assessed rather than improvements made. This system discourages urban sprawl because undeveloped land in high-value areas (i.e. cities) is taxed comparatively higher than developed land of a similar value. Also, this means that comparatively less property tax is passed on to lessees in a rental agreement because the tax depends on the land value only and not the amount of tenants.

This tax is assessed by percent (as opposed to per mil) by the khanate and are used to pay for regional and local government. Rates usually vary from 1% to 8% of assessed land value.

The Social Insurance Premium is a progressive tax (0%-20%) based on income and lifestyle choices (i.e. smoking and drug use). It is used exclusively to fund the Social Security Trust and is paid directly to said authority in monthly installments.

Average Dovakhanese Tax Burden: 35% of income, 4% of land value, 18% of Lîröt spent.

There are few tax exemptions and they are usually settled in the monthly withholding. That said, the Dovakhanese Reserve settles its debts for the previous year in early March ahead of the Dovakhanese New Year.

Stay safe

National Emergency Telephone Number
111 for all services (landline and mobile)

Safety is not a serious issue in Dovakhan, save for certain public housing projects outside of major cities where violent crime is not unheard of, and rare instances in which common strikes or protests become violent.

Violent crime against tourists or strangers is very rare, but there is pickpocketing and purse-snatching. That said, don’t leave your common sense at home!

Should one run into trouble, it is important to be familiar with emergency services in Dovakhan:

  • A national military police force, the National Militia, patrols the borders and rural areas without their own local police force. A special branch of the National Militia, the Republican Guard, is charged with the protection of national government buildings and the Khagan-Chancellor.

If there is a local police force, it is run by the prefecture under the supervision of the Department of the Interior. Note that policemen of any ilk do not like to be asked for directions!

  • EMS/Ambulance service in Dovakhan is operated by the Dovakhanese Green Crescent, the national branch of the ICRC, and funded by the state.

  • Fire brigades are run by each commune or prefecture.

Stay Out of Trouble

Dovakhan is a liberal country. As such, many things, such as use of narcotics and prostitution, are less regulated than they may be at home. This does not mean you need to “go wild,” however. As a general rule, you are allowed to hurt yourself, but your are fully responsible for your actions:

  • Some general things to take note of:
  1. Dovakhan is a civil law jurisdiction where there is relatively little use of jurisprudence and where one is often considered “guilty until proven innocent.” Dovakhanese police are quite tolerant up to a point, then they became wholly unforgiving. Likewise, Dovakhanese prisons are not pleasant places and often don’t have any creature comforts like hot water or mattresses.

  2. While it is not required to have identification, police have the right to ask for it within 20 km of the border and in the course of a police investigation. Also, police sometimes act outside the law and hassle people for not having ID during a random check. Prudent travellers should carry their passport (with visas, if applicable) like Dovakhanese carry their national ID card. The same thing goes for tickets on public transportation, which usually run on an honour system but where there are occasional checks.

  3. Finally, failing to aid someone in distress, even if that means calling an ambulance, is illegal unless doing so would harm you or others.

  • The public drinking age is 16 for beer, wine, and cider consumed with a meal, and 18 for anything else. ID is typically not asked for, but the purchase age for outside consumption is 18 and it is illegal to sell to a minor. There is no minimum drinking age in a private home provided parental consent is given.

That said, “disruption of the peace because of intoxication” is a misdemeanor that will land you time in the police prefecture until you can behave yourself (although you’ll be in good company in places like Selande). Also, dangerous intoxication of a minor under parental supervision is classified as child abuse and operation of machinery or motorized transport under the influence of alcohol is a serious offense.

  • Cannabis and tobacco are freely available to anyone over 18 years of age.

That said, a license is required to sell these drugs and unlicensed sale and/or exportation is a crime. As with alcohol, “disruption of the peace because of intoxication” is illegal.

Other controlled narcotics, including so-called “mushrooms” are classified as “hard drugs” and may only be procured at special pharmacies with a doctor’s order and are otherwise illegal to use. Possession of hard drugs is a serious misdemeanor and dealing is a quite serious offense. Additionally, providing minors with narcotics is classified as child abuse in addition to “dealing,” and operation of machinery or an automobile under the influence of any narcotic is a felony.

Tabaccco, cannabis, and convenience items are sold at near-ubiquitous “tobacconists” or Tabakeri.

  • Prostitution is legal in Dovakhan and its practitioners are licensed, unionised, and regulated by the government.

Pimping, sex trafficking, and street prostitution are highly illegal, but all are common in many major cities.

  • The age of consent is 15 unless the older partner is within two years of their partner’s age. However, in cases of clear dominance by one partner over another (e.g. teacher, police officer), the legal age of consent is 18.

  • There is no strict media censorship in Dovakhan and anyone can legally view any film or video content.

However, Dovakhanese law prohibits the sale or distribution of content based on the following criteria: Unless accompanied by parents, children under 7 may not view especially terrifying sequences, cartoon violence, or intense quarreling; children under 11 may not view interpersonal abuse or realistic violence; and children under 15 may not view gruesome physical or sexual violence.

To disclaim liability for policing their own content, distributors are invited to submit their films to the Dovakhanese Academy of Cinematic Arts’ Media Review Board, a division of the Department of Culture. The board’s trained behavioral psychologists will issue an authoritative ruling that classes the films as 0, 7, 11, or 15 years.

Stay healthy

  • Most mundane health issues can be easily dealt with at your local pharmacy, which is denoted by a sign with green-lettered Dovopojupik (Dovakhanese State Pharmaceutical Company) and a mortar & pestle. They sell medicine, contraceptives and often beauty/general health products, but often nothing else as convenience items are usually only sold at “tabacconist” shops (Tabakeri).

At pharmacies, medicines must be ordered from the counter, even for non-prescription medicines, and doctors will only be familiar with the international name of medicines (as opposed to any brand name). Dovakhanese pharmacists are very helpful and, in addition to help with various medicines and providing basic health information, they can even advise you on the edibility of plants you may have gathered on your travels.

  • Outpatient visits take place in a doctor’s office or, for a fee, in a private home or hotel room. General practitioners, specialists, and dentists are self-employed and mostly keep their offices in a central clinic. For private offices on the street, you will see signs reading “Fedinan Mobisufofoj” for GPs. A consultation with a Dovakhanese GP costs 7820 Lirot (20$) whether one is a citizen benefiting from Dovakhanese Social Secuirty or not.

  • All Dovakhanese hospitals are either government or cooperative-owned. They range in size from the massive national research hospitals in Tschmuschaboumtopolis to tiny village infirmaries in rural Altea, but they all meet first-world standards.

It is worth noting that hospitals are for scheduled surgery, infant deliveries, and dire emergencies ONLY. Visiting a hospital for urgent, but non-emergency medical problems is frowned-upon, especially since nearby clinics almost always have a 24-hour urgent ward to deal with things like broken bones and general malaise.

  • Thanks to a bi-lateral social services agreement, hospital visits by Dannistrians that benefit from the Dannistrian National Health Service are covered by the Dovakhanese Social Security System (Zajisuvodifot Mobijadepotk Dovakhank), which will generally reimburse 80-90% of expenses. Other travellers are not covered, will be billed the full price, and should thus have travel insurance that covers medical costs. Note, however, that medical fees in Dovakhan, even when paying the full price, are low compared to those in countries with a fully private system.

  • Public toilets may be hard to come by outside of your accommodation and may not even be available in some small cafes, so plan accordingly. Should you find yourself in desperation, the local train station usually has a lavatory and, if all else fails, public urination isn’t particularly frowned upon given you find yourself a private place to do your business.

  • Conversely, there are a plethora of public bathing options, with showers and/or baths in most major train stations and neighbourhood community centres. Another important thing to note is that all public fountains have potable water as per national law. Taps with non-potable water are painted yellow in Dovakhan or have “lolojisuobadk” (non-potable) indicated somewhere near them.

Respect / Culture

It is STRONGLY recommended that one learns to speak at least rudimentary Dovakhanese, as it is unlikely that anyone outside of tourist centres will be willing to speak English, provided they know any. What’s more, not at least trying to speak Dovakhanese is considered one of the worst gaffes that one can make as a foreigner, as it is quite often interpreted as “why don’t you all just speak English,” which further interpreted as “why don’t you just die.”

Also note that the Franco-Jewish population of Isslmeer feels the same way about their language. This makes for a particularly hairy situation in Selande, where the only way to avoid any conflict is to learn both languages.

Once you become confortable with Dovakhanese, be sure to remember your manners. Dovakhan, though a democratic and egalitarian society, maintains a clear heirarchy through language. Thus please, thank you, yes ma’am/sir, and no ma’am/sir are the order of the day with one’s elders and social betters. To that effect, savvy travelers should make careful use of the formal verses informal version of you (vopez and to, respectively). For simplicity’s sake, use vopez with everyone EXCEPT with friends, children, or anyone who has explicity asked you to use to

Dovakhan is a compact country and the Dovakhanese have had to adapt accordingly. For example, travelers from Anglophone countries might notice the extreme importance of interpersonal contact and appeal in all areas of like (see HIGH-CONTEXT CULTURE / and an apparent lack of concern for personal space. However, where the Dovakhanese lack an innate “space bubble,” they make up for it with a very clear “sound bubble.” Loudness above a low talking voice in virtually any public place will draw multiple hairy eyeballs, so keep it down!

On the subject of in-town dress, Dovakhan is surprisingly conservative. To the average Dovakhanese person, sneakers are for the tennis court, shorts are for hiking, flip-flops are for the beach, jeans and a t-shirt are only acceptable if you’re under 20, and baseball caps are unheard of.

Otherwise, business casual is the most acceptable form of dress in cities except when the occasion calls for formal dress. Indeed, you will be surprised by the number of twenty-somethings in a seemingly-grungy bar with a jacket and tie, even if it’s from a thrift store. In any case, there is generally no penalty for breaking this unwritten dress code, except perhaps being turned away from a restaurant, but you will most certainly be labeled as a tourist and treated as one.

Perhaps incongruously, all beaches in Dovakhan are clothing-optional. That said, those that have little to boast about should consider covering up or finding another part of the beach.

Breatfeeding in public is extremely rare, but perfectly acceptable.

Sensitive topics
Dovakhan is a much more complicated country than foreign media would lead you to believe. Its people hold a variety of political opinions and most will not appreciate foreigners stereotyping them as ultra-leftist, hippie, elitist, or otherwise.

However, it has been said that debate and discussion are a Dovakhanese national pastime and Dovakhanese people will often engage you in discussions of all sorts, whether it pertain to the latest films, art, music, or geopolitics. Try to be informed about Dovakhanese culture and internal politics if you want to be taken seriously in these sorts of conversations and be civil in your debate but not so much that you’re afraid to be provocative, as this word has positive connotations in Dovakhanese. :smiley:

Dovakhan is a strictly secular republic and Dovakhanese rarely advertise their religious beliefs. Generally speaking, it’s not appropriate inquire about someone’s religious beliefs just as it would be to inquire about how much money someone makes.

To that effect, discussion of money is mildly taboo. Comparing or discussing prices of things is considered to be “a foreign thing” and you probably shouldn’t do it.

Finally, try not to make generalizations on all of Dovakhan based on experiences in the South Coastal Metropolis. This is the cultural, political, and economic centre of Dovakhan, but it is closer to other metropolitan areas its size (e.g. Liberty City, Nordu Dannistra City, Cupertino) in pace and attitude than it is to the rest of Dovakhan. That is why one should wait until ventering oustide of the Tschmuschaboumtopolis-Tkanatdovakhiastaat-Selande bloc before passing judgement on all of Dovahkan.

See Also



NAT’L EMERGENCY NUMBER: 111 (mobile and landline); 112, 999, and 911 also work
TDD RELAY: 08 25 71 75 88 (08 DOVAVOZ 8)

All personal numbers within Dovakhan have ten digits.

0 + region code + NN NN NN NN

0 - International access
1 - Tschmuschaboumtopolis, Apolista
2 - Tschmush, Tkanatdovakhiastaat, Islmeer
3 - Kazakhov, Mariya
4 - Bovia, Zhovia
5 - Altea, Agripia
6 - Tokana (Former Dovakhanese Marian Sea)
7 - Mobile
8 - Toll Free
9 - VoIP

Dovazama’s freephone number 08 25 71 81 51 (08 DOVAZAMA)
Calling a US number 00 1 202-867-5309
Calling Dovakhan +929 07 87 65 43 21

After the state-owned Dovakom was disvested, several private companies emerged to provide fast, efficient service across the nation. Tsalut?, DabosDovakhan, and Kanatkom are the major telecom providers.

Phonebooths are nearly ubiquitous in municipalities and there is at least one in every village (look in the post office). However, these phones only accept microchip bank cards or harmonized, prepaid PIN cards using an access number.

Mobile telephones are all on the GSM standard with prepaid, rechargeable SIM cards. Because they are still considered a novelty, coverage drops off significantly above the Metropolitan South.


Dokabos is an obsolescent network of teletext terminals that were deployed to Dovakhanese households from the 1980s. Their main use was the phone directory, thus relieving the need for bulky collections of paper directories. They also allowed mail order online retailing, ticket bookings, games, chat rooms, messaging, inter-university communication, etc.

Those used to speedy Internet connections will no doubt find these bulky antique computer terminals quite laughable. However, they are much simpler, cheaper, and safer to use than standard Internet-ready computers because they are text-based, limited in features (e.g. no word processing), and operate over a centralised, telecom-controlled network.

Dokabos terminals can be found in post offices (great for making free directory inquiries), certain telephone booths (if they haven’t switeched to Internet), and a surprising number of homes. Indeed, the adoption of the World Wide Web was relatively slow in Dovakhan because many felt they already had a perfectly acceptable Dovakhanese equivalent.

ACCESS CODE FOR DOKABOS: 12 00 + name of service (to be typed)

Finally, if you’re tempted to go out and subscribe to the service, you should be aware that it’s no longer possible as of 2006 when the phase-out of Dokabos began. However, all of Dokabos’ services are available via Internet as of 2005.


Before the privatisation and disvestiture of Dovakom, telephone service was so expensive and often of such quite poor quality that people took telephone calls in their local post office and nowhere else. Thus government agencies, businesses, and individuals alike continued to use the telex network first set up in the 1900’s for important messages. Since then, even though there is still a niche market for telex, telex machines are fast disappearing from public life.


Partially thanks to its similarities with Dokabos, the Internet (Dabosufoet in Dovakhanese) exploded in popularity when the first exchange points were established in 1998. Internet cafes (ufoeteri) are now found in almost every town and city in the country and large cities have prominent free wifi hot spots (e.g. Grand Republic Station in Tschmuschaboumtopolis).

Also, dial-up access is available from any public or phone using per-minute standard rates. Some pay-phones have an internet terminals or a fold-out table for laptops. You provide the phone jack (standard European).

Finally, Public libraries also have small computer labs and sometimes free wi-fi.


The national postal corporation, Dofehabet, has a monopoly on first-class letter services and mail under 600 g and is the only corporation that can operate post offices and deliver to post boxes (NB: Post boxes are located on the street and in post offices, not on private property). As of 2007, however, any other services may be procured through a private postal operator.

Dofehabet has benefited from the competition, though, and now provides quite fast service. Standard-class mail usually arrives within one business day (Monday-Friday) nationwide and within 3-5 business days internationally.

No post offices are open during the weekends, but main post offices might have self-service postage machines available in the hall with P.O. boxes during non-business days.


Dovakhan represents an isolated language and culture group, so nearly all broadcast media is home-grown. Because of this, there are major costs involved and thus the bulk of national broadcasting is undertaken by the State. The Goverment almost fully funds the two major national broadcasters, Dabosfet Dovakhan and FubaDov, even though there is some advertising present on television these days.

This situation is potentially dangerous to the freedom of information. So, to ensure political independence, individual employees are responsible for electing the Board of Directors and have a say in content. Then, there is an internal two source rule that requires two credible independent sources for any given story. Finally, There is a special non-partisan ombudsman appointed by the Khagan-Chancellor and approved by the Cama for a fifteen year term to investigate grievances on the part of the public.

That said, there is a notable private industry in radio, not to mention a plethora of local and national newspapers. Also, there is a new private television station (see below). These are managed by the Office of Communication (Dep’t of the Interior).


Most television in Dovakhan is distributed through Dabosfet Dovakhan - Z.E. which is a fully state-owned corporation. It has five channels available via analogue nationwide:

Dovakanal 1 broadcasts news, talk, sports, television serials and children’s entertainment. Channel 1.

Kanat 2 broadcasts different local interest shows based on what khanate one watches it in. It typically serves as a local access channel and sometimes broadcasts news . This same channel is also known as Khanat 2 in the Isslmeer, where it broadcasts part of the time in French and Tokana 2 in the freely-associated Republic of Tokana where it broadcasts mostly in Tokan. Channel 2.

Nosipajat 3 broadcasts educational programming such as documentaries and coursework for the National Correspondance Institute. Channel 3.

Ujabisobat 4 is responsible for broadcasting cultural programming such as plays, concerts, music videos, art history programs, and more off-beat television serials. Channel 4.

Staatok 5 is a new private channel available on analogue. It broadcasts news, music videos, and talk as well as local and foreign serials. Channel 5.


FubaDov is state-owned national radio corporation. It has two main stations with affiliates across the country that supplement the national programming with their own broadcasts:

FubaDov 1 primarily broadcasts news and information.

FubaDov 2 primarily broadcasts music, arts, and culture.

FubaDov International ( is FubaDov’s international broadcasting arm with over 50 repeaters worldwide. FubaDov International broadcasts in Dovakhanese, French, English, Spanish, Arabic, Chinese, Japanese/Loopish, and, for the first time, in Dannistrian.

There is a massive private for-profit and community radio industry in Dovakhan.


The Dovakhanese New Star is the newspaper of record for the Republic-Khanates of Dovakhan. As such, it is quite avowedly neutral, this usually being achieved by what the paper itself calls a “balance of bias,” as well as highly “professional” workplace standards, reporting, and usage. This latter element has led some to claim that the paper is “pedantic” or “elitist.” The newspaper is privately-owned and is printed in Tschmuschaboumtopolis.

The Working Day is a left-of-centre newspaper that serves as the mouthpiece for the Social Democratic Party and the left-wing elements of the Liberal-Democratic and Green Parties. It has a populist bent and is popular among blue and white-collar workers alike, as the name would suggest. It claims to be independent, but its senior editor and principle contributors are connected with either the trade unions congress or the Social-Democratic Party. The newspaper is publicly-traded and printed in Selande.

Critical Reasoning is a right-of-centre newspaper that consistently espouses the values and opinions of the Populist Party, though is not formally associated with the party. Though it deals with many important issues of the day, the paper often has a light-hearted and self-deprecating bent as the voice of a right-wing minority in a solidly left-wing country. The newspaper is publicly-traded and printed in Tschmuschaboumtopolis.

Living Manifesto is a far-left newspaper, which makes it appropriate that it is owned by the Dovakhanese Communist Party. It claims to preserve a “populist” voice (by using the word “comrade” profusely, for example), but the paper comes under heavy criticism for pedantic and convoluted usage. It is the least popular of Dovakhan’s national daily newspapers. It is printed in Rejia.

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