(Joint post with Cowlass, again)
June 26th, 2022
Jørgen gives Esta a tight hug, “You’re alright. I will be back there soon.” Their talk was short, and far away from the doors of the palace. Hidden away so no one would have heard them.
Esta, on the verge of tears, straightens herself up. Taking a moment to breathe and regain herself. Within only a few moments her sadness is gone and she returns to her old, crazy self. “Okay j-just don’t watch too much anime out here.” She jokes, with a soft rawness in her voice.
He rolls his eyes, “I’m not going to watch anime, just need to make a phone call.”
“To Daddy?” Esta looks at Jørgen in the eyes.
Jørgen scowls, “No, not him. Now scram, you owe Estrid a dance.” He ruffled her hair, “Little crazy.” He jokes, patting Esta on the back as she returns to the dance. After making sure she enters the palace, he sits down at a nearby bench taking his phone out and calls Edgy Viking in his contact list. Smile on his face as the phone connects.
“Hello?” Masculine voice answered on the other end with a sound of a yawn coming right afterwards.
“Hey hey edgelord. Sorry, I mean edge prince.” Jørgen speaks in a teasing tone.
“Ha ha, shut up.” The voice answered back jokingly as he let out what can best described as a chuckle and a yawn. “And I personally think edge jarl would be a better nickname.”
“I know things are rough if you need to downgrade your own title.” Jørgen smiled, crossing his legs together.
“Hey, fits well with your nickname of the anime jarl.” Voice teased back. “How are you doing Jørgen? It’s been a while.”
“Trying to figure out our matching nicknames? How cute.” Replying back in a teasing tone. “I’m doing better, I finally left my castle.”
“You’re finally touching grass? I am so proud of you!”
“Oh ha ha.” He rolled his eyes, “Olav suggested it, then I voluntold Esta to join us.” Jørgen tone shifted when he said Esta’s name.
“The Sayyed coronation? I saw it on the news. Please say Little Crazy kept herself out of trouble.” The voice on the other end was far more soft in tone now, more brotherly.
He shook his head, “No, she couldn’t help herself. While I wasn’t looking she grabbed Princess Estrid and the Fyllikenkrasjlander, uh Matriarch Ingrid, into one of her parties.” He pinches his nose, matching the voice on the phone with the same brotherly tone. “Also drove my rental car into the ocean again.”
The voice just let out a sigh of relief. “Well knowing my sister, she has done far worse stuff.” They let out a small chuckle as well. “Surprised those two joined her though, from what i’ve heard they seem to be quite dutiful compared to the chaos you and Esta do.”
“Believe, I was surprised Ingrid joined in. Estrid, well you barely have to push to get her to do anything. I take it she hasn’t sent any of those videos or pictures to you?” He asked in a questioning manner. “I already got a call from King Olav about it. You know how awkward it is to explain it?”
“I understand why Esta seems to like Estrid so much then.” The voice chuckled. “I can assure you she hasn’t, I think she finally got the message after last time I chastised her for sending something like… that to me.” They answered in an awkward tone. “Though I thought you said that Olav had blocked her number since last time?”
“She is getting creative about getting around it. Spirits be kind, she even sent it to his wife. His fucking wife.” He gives an annoyed tone of voice. “I’m not sure why she listened to you after telling her off. Then again, I’m not sure how Esta is popular with the Right Wing in all honesty.”
“Perhaps we Blåskovians are just specialized in black magic.” The voice teased. “Though honestly, her obsession over Olav is getting insane, want me to tell her to stop it?”
“In all honesty, I don’t think you could. I have been trying for years, it’s only a matter of time until she shows up in Olav’s castle in his bedroom.” He says half joking, half fully believing it would happen one day. “I’m also worried she is not being obsessive with Olav, she might target someone I couldn’t help manage. Like imagine she starts focusing on some business executive with less morals than Olav or someone who would try to blackmail her?” He gives a stressed sigh.
“So, throwing Olav to the big bad wolf since the alternative is scarier?” The voice teased before a small chuckle could be heard from them. “Also seriously you should stop predicting the things Esta might do towards Olav, last time it actually happened.”
Jørgen burst out laughing, “Spirits be kind, I am still not sure how she managed to sneak herself in that present.” He shook his head, smiling at the memory. “Spirits bless Olav for being a good man, anyone lesser would have taken advantage of her.”
“I think that might be why she is going after him.” Voice said in a slight chuckle as they heard Jørgen laugh. “She sees him caring about you, Ingrid and many others. She might want him to treat her that way, though she does seem to enjoy it when Olav ignores her so I might be wrong there.”
“In all honesty, I don’t think Esta knows why she goes after Olav so much. She claims it’s fun but she says that about most things when she’s acting like Esta.” Jørgen stops for a moment, “I think Olav might have an addiction to collecting royal orphans or royals from bad families. Like he just sees a royal without a parent and just runs in to adopt them. Then Esta sees how he forcibly adopts them and she wonders why she isn’t getting part of it.”
“You’d think a man with nine kids would already have enough of those to deal with.” Laughter rang out from Jørgen’s phone as it said that. “Honestly, it’s been a long while since I’ve met that man. Kind of miss talking with him, did I ever tell you about the time he showed me how to sail?”
Jørgen joined in on the laughing, “He talked to me about having a state visit to Ymirland in uh, October, yeah it was October. Get this, the Jarlyia of Ymirland and the Crown Prince haven’t been outside their castle since the civil war ended, their only parent is dead. So you know he’s just going to adopt them, I got a bet with Ingrid riding on it.” He gives another laugh, “So he taught you how to sail? Here I thought you were only adopted by my parents.” He smiles briefly before a small frown forms on his face.
“May those twins be prepared then, you’re likely going to win that bet.” The voice chuckled. “Yeah it was during one of my visits to Vakrestrender to meet you when we were dating, but I had to make a stop in Norgsveldet during the trip. Spent two days there, so Olav invited me over to sail with him and his son Johan. You know one who looks kind of emo?”
“Ah, so you two would have gotten along swimmingly then.” Jørgen teased. “Olav tried to get me to sail as well, but somehow the boat caught fire. Wasn’t my fault by the way.” He assured his ex.
“Ah ha. Totally not your fault.” Jørgen swore he could hear his ex roll their eyes. “Though if I remember correctly his son wasn’t exactly very ‘emo’ looking when I was there, I think he only started dressing up like that afterwards. At least from what I remember from looking through the internet.”
“Way to go, you got two people to join you in going Emo.” Jørgen teases the voice, then gives a sigh. “That actually brings up part of the reason why I called you. The Sayqidi crown prince, Hakim and Esta danced together. Which of course, Esta couldn’t help but be Esta. The poor kid looked like he was going to either chase after with tears in his eyes or melt apart on the floor.” He unfolded his legs, hunching over on the bench. “I had to take her outside and discuss her behavior again. This time without her partners in crime. Had different results this time.” He looked around him, making sure he was alone and took a deep breath.
“She was being quiet, just standing there and not responding.” He whispered into his phone, “I think she was having one of her episodes.”
“That Hakim doesn’t happen to have any dogs?” The voice joked.
Jørgen didn’t respond to that, simply annoyed at his joke.
Jørgen could hear a sigh from his ex. “Sorry. Look, I know what you’re talking about. She has been like that since she was born.” There were a few more minutes of silence before the ex spoke again. “Just… keep an eye on her. She’s good at acting ‘normal’ for the public for a long while, but at some point, she will slip up. It can have very disastrous consequences if that happened in Sayyed.”
“I been, she slipped up twice now but thank the spirits it’s been either quiet or not as bad.” Jørgen leaned back, more relaxed now. “The event is almost over at least, it will be good to get her home. Take her to a zoo or something.” He gave a sharp sigh, “Maybe I can see if there is an anime con going on. All assuming she isn’t need in Lapliszna.”
“I mean her partying with Ingrid and Estrid is likely the least worst thing she has done, though likely the worst those two have done.” The ex simply chuckled out as he thought over all the insanity his sister has done over the years. “If I ever find a break from my duties, I could fly her to Vakrestrender. Spend some time like we used to do…” He let out a nostalgic sigh.
“You sure your wife wouldn’t mind you visiting your attractive, handsome and beautiful ex?” Jørgen smiled as he teased over the phone.
Another chuckle came from Jørgen’s ex, though a bit more solemn in tone. “It might be the only good thing she would have done for me during my marriage by allowing it.” His voice is half joking and half serious. “I’m currently in a…. rough spot in my relationship with her.”
“Do you want to talk about it?” Jørgen said in a soft, loving tone.
“I… will try to avoid talking about her.” Jørgen could hear a quiet sigh from his ex. “I’m just afraid for my son. He shouldn’t have to go through this…”
Jørgen gives a nod, remembering that it’s not a video call, he spoke. “No child should, but I am confident you are doing what you can to be a good father. You’re a good man.”
Silence was Jørgen was answered with until he heard only a small. “I wish I was.” Though before Jørgen could ask for his ex to clarify he spoke up again. “At some point I do want my son to see Vakrestrender. Perhaps when he turns 5 next year I will bring him there.”
“The sands of Vakrestrender will always welcome you. I will be sure to give you and your son only the most grand of welcomings, completely over the top and unnecessary lavish.” Jørgen said halfway joking, halfway already planning the party in his head. He waits a few seconds, “It will be nice to see you in person again.”
“When isn’t the welcome that you give not lavish or over the top?” His ex joked back, before turning more serious and speaking softly. “I promise you I will visit you at some point.”
“Some time soon I hope. I miss you…” He kept his soft loving tone with him. “Maybe it can be the first time I don’t have a lavish welcome. Then again why change a good thing?” He smiled as he joked.
His ex chuckled. “I miss you and your lavish welcomes. I am sure once I’ve finished a few things over here in Teieleie, that I will visit.”
“Teieleie? I’m afraid I don’t recognize Blaskog city. Then again, I don’t recognize most cities in Blaskog.” He tried to think about where it could be on the map.
Once more Jørgen swore he could hear his ex roll his eyes as he gave out a sarcastic laugh. “It’s not in Blåskog, it’s in Rikevaarland.”
“Ah, that place. I think I have been there before, not Teieleie but that city is part of Neo-Fantøn.” He thinks back to those thoughts.
“No, that is Handelvaar. Teieleie is the city which had a little insurrection in January.”
“Ah, I always avoid the news. It’s better that way for my mental health.” He scratched the back of his neck. He probably should do more to keep in touch with the world.
“I am certain if a set political event isn’t mentioned in an anime you likely wouldn’t know about it.” His ex joked and let out another yawn.
Jørgen gave a laugh, “Hey now, I have you know Valkyr news agency has gotten very quick about animating the news now.”
Jørgen could hear him chuckle. “Trust me I know, mainly because I saw you sharing on Pigeon of a video clip of an animated Olav holding a speech about the current military exercise in Vakrestrender.”
“Don’t tell Olav, he still believes that speech wasn’t animated.” He jokes, “Thank the spirits he never checks his Pigeon or I would be having a very awkward phone call. Well, another awkward phone call.”
“I mean best for him to be perfectly honest.” His ex jokes. “From what i’ve seen of it half of the replies he gets on like official stuff his accounts put out is either people writing a bit to sensually about him, constant references about the anime version of him or insulting him for being a ‘neko fucker’.”
“You know those replies are curated right? What have you been looking at now?” He half joked, half seriously questioning what his ex has been doing to get those results.
“Mostly just been checking out the anime you keep mentioning, I think it’s ‘This Commoner Cannot Be This Cute’?” His ex says and Jørgen could hear in the background a tapping of a keyboard.
“It’s a great anime, probably Valkyr’s greatest success with it came to anime. At least within the Crown Realm.” He felt proud of his people’s achievement. “I even got Olav and Wilhelmina to sign my first edition copy of the manga.”
“May the gods bless their souls. But yeah, a lot of people apparently really love how Olav is in that anime. A lot of thirst posts.” Jørgen could hear his ex shudder from remembering about it.
“Curious, I never reposted any of those kinds of posts. How did you find them if you weren’t looking?” Jørgen gave a teasing tone. “Wait you’re not also following Esta’s other account are you? You might need to bleach your eyes then.”
“Yeah… I unfortunately have. I’ll be honest, I think most of those sensual posts were just hers. She told me it was just a normal anime account.”
“Your fault for believing her. If she wasn’t already on the NCIS watchlist, that account would put her on it.” Jørgen internally cringes at some of her questionable posts.
“A lot of it is just her shipping herself and Olav…” Jørgen’s ex said horrified.
Jørgen gives a sigh, “I am honestly scared by her obsession with him sometimes. Most times actually.”
“At the very least she is much better on her main account.”
“Well, no posts about Olav on it. Which is always a good thing. It’s honestly how scary she switches her personality on her different accounts. Her main account is all business, anime and her kitchen knife collection.” Jørgen stops for a moment, “You know, I don’t think I ever actually seen her cook before.”
The ex just lets out an awkward chuckle with that. “Oh she does that very rarely, yep.” Though before Jørgen was allowed to ask about the ex’s awkward chuckle he spoke up again. “It is impressive how many far right wing folks follow her as well.”
Jørgen gives a sigh, “Yeah, I’m aware. Anytime she posts the two of us or I post us together. I get a flood of comments from them.”
“It is very unfortunate. Not sure how she does it, but she is good at playing up the whole ‘nationalist republicanist’ fear.”
“Be honest with me, how much of that fear is valid? I mean in Lapliszna. She never talks about it to me, I don’t really see anything about it online either outside of her account.” He curiously asked.
His ex let out a sigh. “Perhaps at some point they might have existed, but by now? Any such threat is fabricated. It’s all to drum up support from Norgsveltian conservatives in a designed way to ensure that despite her other aspects that would scare them away. Would still support the state structure in Lapiliszna, this on top of Blåskovian propaganda made about it as well. Afterall, if everyone believes the only opposition that is in Lapliszna is a hirdist one that is maintained by the government there, would anyone call for the government to change?”
“After all these years, you still sound like a nerd.” Jørgen chuckled at his Ex’s expertise. “You could have just said no, it was over blown.”
“But that would have been booooring.” His ex said while letting out a chuckle.
“Okay, a little crazy, would you like some chicken strips?” He said in a joking tone.
“Oh yes please!” His ex replicated Esta’s voice as he said that. “But yeah I don’t do my royal political duties for nothing.”
Jørgen gave a hardy laugh, “Sounds awful, how dare they make you work.”
“I know it is oh so awful!” His ex chuckled. “I should be like you, having all the time to watch anime.” He teased.
“Hey now, I do quite a bit of work. Someone has to host all those festivals, parties, film gatherings, more parties, host the Valkyr Media Arts Festival, be dead drop handsome and did I mention partying?” Jørgen jokes, “Seriously, I did not remember my father having to host so many parties and festivals.”
“Try being part of diplomatic missions, secret military exercises, host cultural events to show of nationalism, spending dozens of hours in Royal courts and other boring shit.” His ex quipped back. “I wish I went partying as much as you.”
“Well I do most of those things, just not the military or the royal court. Privileges of being the only noble in Vakrestrender I suppose. That does remind me, I have to organize the royal invite to the Ulvrikian Animation Expo for Justelvard and I have to double check if we’re hosting the Ulkrikian-Auroran Film festival or they are.” He scratches the back of his neck, “I really need to hire a secretary.”
“I’m shocked, you getting close with those Morstaybishlians?” His ex said while faking a gasp. “What would Johanna think!” He let out a chuckle. “Surprised you don’t have a secretary already, I think I would have ended up dead in paperwork without mine.”
Jørgen faked Johanna’s stoic voice. “Good, you can stab their monarch while watching one of those an-memes.” He laughed at his own joke, “I suppose I can put out an ad for one? Or maybe talk to my head of staff? I never actually hired people, only ever contracted work for the festivals and such.”
“I mean if you put out an ad you just have the anime version of you go asking for one.” His ex jokes. “But yeah I advise just going to your head of staff and she could help you with it.”
“Why did you assume it’s a she? Who am I your father?” Jørgen made another joke, smiling as he did so.
His ex bursted out laughing at that. “Well the two of you do have a lot of kemonomimi maids.” He teased.
“Majority of Vakrestrender is Kemonomimi while the majority of Kemonomimi in Blaskog is working for your dad.” He said while laughing.
Jørgen’s ex chuckled at that. “And most of those times he could just go to the brothel instead of hiring more maids.”
“Save himself the trouble and just convert to Akuanism, then he can just marry one or two dozen of them.”
“Unfortunately this is this law made four centuries ago that says that is not allowed. By the gods I wish it was.”
“Thinking about a change of religion now are we?”
The ex simply chuckled. “Not very religious personally, but hey at least in the akuanist faith I could have had several partners without the media losing its shit."
“Oh several partners then? Are you sure that many people can like you at once?” Jørgen rolled his eyes while he joked. “I’m sure you can have two at max before one of them strangled you.”
“Not sure about that, have you seen the likes I’ve gotten about pictures of me shirtless after training?” He teased Jørgen. “Including you~”
It was Jørgen’s phone wallpaper on his home screen. “I assure you I would never look at such vile sin.” He faked an over the top dramatic voice.
“Oh please, Esta has told me.”
“That little…” Jørgen started to blush after getting snitched on by Esta. “I bet she couldn’t wait to tell you could she?”
“Oh she couldn’t contain herself to tell me about it!” The ex chuckled.
“I swear she wants us back together more tha-” Jørgen cuts himself off.
“Well, she isn’t the only one…”
The phone call went silent. Jørgen was the first to speak back, “I still love you Wilan.”
“I-I still lo-” Wilan started saying before a clear voice from the background, which Jørgen had assumed must be Wilan’s wife.
“Who are you talking to?” Her voice said in a skeptical and annoyed tone.
“Fuck, I’ll call you back.” Wilan said quickly but before he ended the phone call he let out a short quiet. “I love you.”